I never thought I’d live to hear a sailor with such a high pitched voice. Spiders are the most amazing bugs I have ever seen. They are able to make someone fly, curse, and change their voice in a split second, as well as temporarily lose their religion. I was stunned beyond words and seriously worried that I just had to stop eating my sandwich and stare at skype.
Imagine this:
Meri in a low pitched voice, saying: “Now my arm is swollen! Great, just great… blah blah blah blah..” *this my friends is a rant so imagine when it suddenly and drastically goes to…* “AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!” *in a really high pitched voice* If I ever had doubts about Meri’s gender it would have been altered completely.
As for being a sailor, I have never heard her use the word Fuck so many times I told her to go to a confession. And the phrase “Are you kidding me?! Are you fucking kidding me?!” as well as “I will kill you! You mother-” *tooot toooot tooooot tooooot beeeep beeep beep beeeeep* (For the sake of all those who still assume that my tumblr is PG I have censored the rest of the conversation)
Not to mention the use of MY NAME in VAIN. So much VAIN it felt like a banshee had gotten lose and was cursing my existence. Regardless, my eardrums are fully intact and though my perception completely altered. Meri is not a Druggie, she’s a sailor. A god damn sailor that has a blood lust for the death of eight legged feinds that make Sweeny Todd and Freddy Kruger look like a bunch of kids with lollipops.
If Spiderman thinks he’s gotten a handful with his adversaries, he’s wrong. Meri the Sailor trumps them all.
What made me die laughing is that if I was there, I’d end up hugging her, not for comfort but for protection. She’s the Captain of the Shrieking Ship (that’s what I would name the ship) and I’m merely her first mate. I love you :p
“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!” — I shall never forget these words EVER.
